When not to correct a toddler

Toddlers need a lot of steering in the right direction. 

I mean that literally as well as figuratively. They stagger about like tiny drunks then look at you, outraged, when an inanimate object trips them up. They do gross things, like trying to eat pre-chewed gum they found stuck to a table. They have zero table manners. They think it’s hilarious to mock people (only funny when they’re doing it to someone else). 

TL;DR – it’s wild that anyone makes it through the toddler years unscathed. 

So we correct our kids to keep them safe. 

• Look where you’re going
• Don’t eat that, you don’t know where it’s been
• Please don’t chase the dog with your fork
• Yes, that’s a very good impression of Daddy, but I don’t want to see what you’re chewing
• Ych a fi!!! (my mum is half Welsh).

Etc.

But there is one occasion on which it is NEVER acceptable to correct a toddler.

You must never, ever tell them the correct pronunciation of a word or you will face the wrath of their mother. 

Current adorable mispronunciations in my house include:

Pssss (please) – said specifically when trying to leave the dinner table, never waits for permission, just assumes it’s a passcode and disembarks

Chsss (cheers) – clinks his sippy cup with whatever I’m drinking from and it’s too cute to worry about what nursery will think 

Pain (plane) – he’s never flown before, but given the queues at Gatwick, he’s not wrong 

There are plenty of things we must impart to our children: respect, kindness, street smarts. But until further notice: 

• Dogs say “pah”
• I will be taking no further questions on the subject
• Woe betide anyone who dares try and tell my toddler otherwise